Wait, WHAT? MYSTERY JACKPOTS?!
Yup. For a very limited time, it's not business as usual... we're doing MYSTERY JACKPOTS. It's a loot bag. Or an awesome crate. Like, Schrodinger's Scam!
(regular store's back behind the curtain.)
Yes, yes, if you're looking for the regular store, I think it's all back here somewhere, but right now we're doing something we've never, ever done before: A mystery selection of random products we dug out of the dark history and dusty corners of our warehouse's past. Some items we've discontinued a long time ago, some items are just ship-shy of a few dents and scrapes.
You are ordering the $20 mystery jackpot bundle, filled with rare items from our island of misfit toys, unearthed rare collectibles and memorabilia, and one-of-a-kind surprises. Your satisfaction is 100% guaranteed, and we hope you deeply love the mystery package we send you!
Decks of cards, puzzle boxes, book tests, pyro's, spy gear, lock pick trainers, and brew kits... guys, you're not gonna believe how much awesome gear we're going to pack into these kits.
Do you trust me? You should trust me. (except for that whole "wait, isn't he the guy who hosts 'Scam School'?" thing).
The point is: I absolutely promise you that you're going to be amazed by the values you'll find in your box. (limited time! Limited quantities!)
as always, I love you. Hugs and kissses,
PS: It's NOT Gambling. Because you're going to win! LITERALLY EVERY BOX IS A WINNER!